Learning How to Mosey

This has been an interesting summer. I have be learning the art of the mosey. I used to hike fast and track my rate per mileage. I would aim for under 25 minutes per mile on strenuous hikes. I would train for long, double digit hikes that would take much of the day. In October I got a virus and have not been the same since. We still have not figured out the solution but in the meantime I have not been able to hike. So now we go to trailheads and I do what I call a mosey. We walk slowly and stop often to identify trees or listen to birds. What is most interesting is that I have grown to love this kind of hiking with no goal and no destination. We go as far as I can and then turn around and head back just as slowly. Justin has been really supportive of this new kind of nature bathing. He has spent a lot of time studying trees and learning more about the native flora. Now that I have found the joy in slow hiking I am going to try to slow down all aspects of my life. Faster does not mean better. I will need to retrain after rushing so much. But I am looking forward to what my slower paced life will look like. Here are a few of my pics from favorite times outside this summer.

It's Been Awhile

Every year I say I will be better about journaling and every year I seem to write less! This summer has been very different. Due to some medical issues that have yet to be identified, I am unable to enjoy my favorite passtime- hiking. Since it is usually how I spend 2-3 days per week in the summer, it means I have a lot more time to fill. Not only was hiking my favorite activity but it also helped me stay in shape and release tension and frustration so it has been quite an adjustment this summer. One thing that I have been adding to my routine is meeting friends for coffee. Better yet is when I can meet someone for coffee at a bookstore. I got to do this earlier this month at The Read Queen in Layfayette. Whenever I go to a bookstore, I try to find a book that was not on my radar before going into the store. Sometimes this works out perfectly and sometimes I have a book staring at me for quite awhile to complete. But I have always loved the quote from The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society “Perhaps there is some secret sort of homing instinct in books that brings them to their perfect readers." This is part of the magic browsing in an independent bookstore or library and just happeing upon the right book at the right time. I have gone so far that when a book falls to my feet when I am reshelving or working with books, I often see it as a book jumping into my world and saying READ ME. While I may not complete every book that crosses my path, I certainly give them a closer look and have found many a great read this way. It worked out perfectly again when I met my friend at The Read Queen. There was a beautiful book that caught my eye- Where the Wildflowers Grow by Terah Shelton Harris. I have always been a sucker for the found family trope. And since I knew we were headed to Wyoming for a camping trip, the title seemed to fit the theme. It was such a perfect match for my weekend in nature.

Joyful Moments

 Joyful Moments

It’s has been too long since I’ve done a blog post. No good reason. Just life. It has been hard seeing my mom's memory fade.  I listened to a podcast this week.  It was from Tara Brach and it was exploring the concept of attachment.  I have heard of this before from yoga but for some reason her version clicked with me.  She said attachment is the feeling of wanting when what you want is not what you have.  I need to stop wanting to change things.  I need to accept what is.  For example, I am really sad that my mom no longer knows who I am but I need to stop getting hung up on that and accept it is what it is and to be in the moment and grow with what is.  

One thing I have been getting better at is finding joyful moments.  Every day is filled with joyful moments.  Petey, our new puppy helps me find joy in the simple times.  Seeing him chase after grasshoppers or fallen leaves reminds me how many little things of joy are all around us.  

I also enjoy cooking.  This summer I finally tried out a recipe I got when I was in Iceland last summer.  It is called the Happy Marriage Cake.  It is sort of like a crisp with rhubarb jam in the middle.  I had two recipes.  It was fun to make them both and work on adjusting the amount of butter to make it just right.  (The first try was delicious but did not need the entire stick of butter.). I really like cooking when time allows and I am not hangry.  Speaking of cooking, I am excited for a new cookbook that comes out this week.  the subtitle says it all- I like that the focus is sharing food with people you love.

I continue to enjoy time outside.  I have not had as much time for actual hikes but even walking in the neighborhood is fun as I pay more attention to fauna and flora, especially birds with the Merlin app.

Something I posted on Instagram but I also wanted to share it here:  If you haven't read the book Die With Zero, do it. It talks about memory dividends. Take a trip while you are young and can enjoy that trip for years to come with memory dividends. I've learned never to take a memory for granted. We do not know how long we can collect them and how long we can hold on to them. If there is a memory you've been meaning to make with a loved one, do it now.

Enjoy the Easy Steps

Often when I plan a hike I take notice of the elevation gain. Then as I hike, if it begins with flat or little incline, I think to myself- there must be a lot of uphill ahead of me. So instead of enjoy the easy steps ,I am thinking of the hard to come.  I noticed I was also doing this in life- worrying about future challenges rather than enjoying the "easy steps".  So I have made this mindshift to always enjoy the easy steps both on a hike and in life because the hards steps are going to be ahead whether I think about them or not.  So even if the easy steps are only for a minute or an hour or a day- I need to stop and enjoy the easy steps.  

Summer Solstice

Today is the longest day of the year- lots of light and I feel like I am coming out of darkness. Here are some reminders for me and anyone else who might need it: 

1. Make Connections- Loneliness is a bad road to stay on. When you reach out you will be surprised how much compassion and understanding there is in this world. If you are not feeling it, expand your circle. Take a risk and find some new connections. 

 2. My peace cannot rely of the peace of others- If I can't control it, let it go. This is MUCH harder than it sounds and I still have a long way to go but this is basically the serenity prayer: Accept what I cannot change, Courage to change what I can and the Wisdom to know the difference. There are things I can control and things I can't control. I need to find joy in the life I can control and let go of the rest. 

3. Be Present- Find small joys everyday. The small joys will become a habit even in tough times. 

 4. Do something for others every single day. If we all could follow this tip the world would be so much better. It helps you and helps others at the same time. 

5. Embrace the unknown 

6. Break the freeze habit- release the tension. For years my default has been to hold it in. Here is my new strategy: MELT

Meet myself and others with love 

Everything is unfolding 

Live in the moment 

Take a deep breath 

7. Have hope- lean into positive words: Trust, Peace, Acceptance, Calm, Love, Awareness, Hope, Honesty, Non-judgement, Blessings, Faith

Seasons of Life

I love Autumn! I love the cooler temps and the bold colors and the flannel and the decorations. It also makes me think about my life. I feel like spring is up until 25. Still growing and learning. Summer is up until 50. Fun in the sun. Livin life. Autumn is now until 75 and Winter follows after. When I told my kids this they said that is so depressing. But it does not feel that way at all because I love autumn! I feel like I am the red and orange and yellow of life right now- bold and standing out. Autumn is when you reap all the efforts of your labor- I am harvesting all sorts of love right now. Autumn is when you get cozy and snuggle up with a good book. Related to this- when I turned 50 I said to myself -I want to exit this decade healthier than I entered it. I have had a lot of chronic pain, especially migraines. It effects my quality of life and my ability to enjoy my friends and family as much as i want to. So I have been on a journey these last couple of years. It has cost some money but as my husband reminds me, it is an investment in my health. I have gotten back to a more regular yoga practice, started getting massages while also going to a chiropractor and for physical therappy. All of these things combined have helped me feel better. I just finished reading a book called Die with Zero. This is a good read that helps as we transition from a lifetime of saving to the spending phase. The book mentioned "Memory Dividends" which refers to the idea that the sooner we create fantistic memories the longer we have to enjoy the memories. I really like this thinking as it is so easy to keep putting off great trips and memory makers waiting for the "right time" when it is very likely the right time is NOW... so pardon me while I start planning that trip to Costa Rica!

My 2022 Playlist

If I had to pick three songs that sum up what 2022 has been like so far, here is what I would say: 

Both Sides Now  

I'm Still Standing  

Only a River 

Both Sides Now shows how I have matured. I used to be a lot more black and white and with more and more life experiences I see that when you look at both sides it is a lot easier to have empathy and see that everyone is doing the best they can. 

 I'm Still Standing is how I feel after this summer- it was one thing after another but I'm still standing and trying to see how challenging times help us grow. 

Only a River reminds me how healing nature is for us. Whenever I get out I always realize it is just what I need. I love the mountains but I also love the river- to me it is truly in the moment because the moment of a river is always there for that second never to be the same before or after. I love the sound and the view and the smell and the feel. The only sense that is not engaged is taste- although I usually am eating at the river also. It is just such a healing space for me.

Go with the Flow

Usually summer vacation means lots of down time to catch up and restore. But the summer of 2022 is not turning out that way. My summer began with a three week road trip out east to catch up with friends and family, especially my mom. The first week was great- lots of laughs with Justin, a fun stop in Hocking Hills State Park in Ohio and getting to catch up with many friends while in NJ. But then things got challenging. We picked up Owen after a horrific 22 "direct" flight from Denver whihc then turned into a diversion to Cincinatti. Then we drove to Binghamton to get my mom and head to Vermont to see my cousin. The first 24 hours were fantastic and I was so happy to be with family. Then Owen tested positive with Covid and we quickly sent my mom off to stay at my sister's while we (hopefully) isolated and waited to be reunited. But then 5 days later Justin tested positive so we started the long drive home. As soon as we got home I tested positive. So pretty much the whole month of June was spent with a slow burn of covid. But we tried to regroup and figure out how to find tme for a re-do. In the meantime a job came up for me to work with an adventure travel company in Yosemite National Park. I always like to try new experiences so I decided to dive in and give this a try. It was an intense learning curve and a tremendous amount of hard work but the guests were fabulous and I enjoyed the experience. I was also happy to earn a little extra money to plan a return trip to NJ. But while Justin was waiting in the cell phone lot for my delayed flight our new car was totalled by a hit and run U-Hual truck. So much for earning a little extra money. (In case you do not already know- this is not the time to buy a car. We looked into it in May and cars are selling $5000 over sticker price with a 6-12 month wait.) So I can say I know the universerse is trying to tell me something but I am not sure yet what it is... In the meantime Justin is off to work a job in Glacier National Park and I am going to stick close to home- hoping to finally get my first hike of the summer in! Hiking always clears my head and helps me get perspective so hopefully that will happen this week.

Balancing Health, Money and Time

You might remember in 2019 I posted about intentional spending of time, money and energy. My husband and I have continued along this path of asking when is enough enough when it comes to money and how to balance the need for money (and more importantly health insurance) with a solid balance of time and good health. In March my husband took a leave of absense to test out life on a teacher's salary and also to see what it is like to live without work as an anchor to your routine. He has greatly enjoyed this break. So much so that now that this leave is up he plans to give notice and officially stop working. A lot of people do not understand this mindset so let me try to explain. We have been very fiscally conservative and have saved a large portion of our income since the day we graduated college and started working. This path might not be for everyone but for us we were always happy with "enough" and put most raises and bonuses in mutual funds. Over time this money has given us freedom to leave a job when the match wasn't good, leave secure income and benefits in NJ and move to Colorado where the outdoors lifestyle better fit us and even take a break from full time work now and then. Much of what we enjoy doing requires good health so waiting until the elusive retirement that some choose to do at 70 just isn't appealing to us. So while we are healthy Justin is cashing in on some of his hard-earned frugal years and we are enjoying the pleasure of time and health over money that often creates as many problems as it solves. I know this might not be for everyone but it feels right for us. So now that Justin has all this time you might be wondering what he is going to do. First up he will plan and do some of the longer thru hikes he has always been longing for. First up was supposed to be the Superior Trail. But now it is closed because of smoke from forest fires and drought. So now he is looking for another trail. If you are interested in following along on his hiking adventures- this is his youtube channel.

Perfect Epiphany

This spring break we visited our daughter in Arizona. I was excited to visit Saguaro National Park since I had never been there before. We did several hikes and the scenery was beautiful. On the first two hikes I was looking for the "perfect" cactus. What does the perfect cactus look like? Just look at the emoji on an iPhone- or the Roadrunner cartoons. Basically a tall center body with two assymetrical arms, both pointing upwards. On my third hike- after passing hundreds if not thousands of cacti I finally realized it was not that I wasn't finding the perfect cactus, it is that my defintion of the perfect cactus was more based on clipart and cartoons than the real thing. Once I changed my defintion of "perfect" the trails were full of perfect cacti. It made me wonder how many other times have I had some vision of perfect that was in not why based on reality. Here are some photos of just some of the perfect cacti that I saw.

 Segments 1, 2 and 3 on the Colorado Trail

This fall I was often meeting up with my friend Jenna to go hiking.  Since she lives south of Denver it was fun to look for new places to go that were a reasonable drive and not too crowded.  We went to Roxborough State Park and very much enjoyed the beauty and the trails there.  On the way to that park I noticed we passed Waterton Canyon which is the northern terminus of the Colorado Trail.  So then we met there to hike the start of the Colordao Trail.  The following week we did segment two and I lost my smurf so Justin kindly went back to help me find it.  So now he also completed segment two and the following week the three of us decided to do all of segment one which was made a little easier since Laurel dropped us off at the trailhead and we hiked back to our cars at the other end.  So now we had the first two segments complete.  This past weekend we did segment 3. So now we have 40 miles of the 567 miles completed.  Next time we are going to try a more efficient method.  Rather than doing the shuttle drop off which can add an hour each way to get from the start trailhead to the end trailhead (and then again at the end of the hike to get the drop off car), my friend and I will start at one end and Justin will start at the other.  Then we will drive the opposite car north to an agreed upon meeting point and I will hop back into our car.  This will save us the shuttle time.  We will hopefully still meet somewhere around the middle to eat lunch together.  We will see how far we get with this method.  At some point we will probably need to to transition to weekend backpacking trips because some of the segments are just too long for a day hike but for now it is a fun little project to chip away at.  Also, because of snowy back roads we will be haulting the project until spring.  But since the hikes are pretty hard with both distance and elevation it should keep me motivated to stay fit throughout the winter in order to be ready to hit the trails again in spring.  Here are the stats so far:

 Segment 1:  Just a taste- 13.4 miles Dec 5- start of the Colorado trail out and back

Segment 2: 11.5 miles Dec 20

Segment 2: Smurf Rescue with Justin Dec 24

 

Segment 1(17 miles): Dec 26

Segment 3 (13.4 miles) Jan 3

My 2020 Reading Life

 At the start of 2020 I decided for the first time to sign up for the Goodreads reading challenge.  I set my goal for 30 books.  And then Covid life arrived.  Unlike many who said they could not read, I buried myself in books.  I had made myself read 60 pages before I could look at any news each day.  It helped me start my day without the stress of all that was wrong.  By the end of the year ( or almost) I have ready over 60 titles.  Some were ok and good distractions and some were favorites.  Here are my top picks from what I read in 2020.

 My favorite book for all of 2020 would have to be This Tender Land.  When I first read the synopsis it really did not sound like my kind of book but after seeing it on many lists and having friends suggest it I decided to give it a try.  The characters are so easy to care about and during a year filled with disappointments it was nice to escape into a book where people really helped each other out and were a community for each other.   Another book that I also wouldn't have guessed I would like based on the description was Shiner by Amy Jo Burns but it was also a great read.

My favorite non fiction book was Leave Only Footprints:  My Acadia to Zion Journey Through Every National Park- Conor Knighton .    I am a  sucker for travel memoirs in nature.  But I really liked the lens of this one.  Every entry had really interesting reflections and there was always some tidbit that I had never known before.  And of course it made me more than ever want to start my vanlife adventure visiting many of the places he referenced.

Here are some other stand outs from my 2020 list:

Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup- I started 2020 reading Shoedog- an inspiring memoir by Phil Knight telling the blood, sweat and tears that went into building Nike.  As much as Shoedog was inspiring on how to follow your passion and start a company, Bad Blood was infuriating as to how greed and narcissism can fool many.  To make it even more interesting, the trial is now starting so I will be very curious to see how it turns out for Theronos and Elizabeth Holmes.

Untamed by Glennon Doyle- There is a quote from Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society “Perhaps there is some secret sort of homing instinct in books that brings them to their perfect readers. How delightful if that were true.” I feel like Untamed landed in my lap at the perfect time.  While I did not love every page, there are enough gems in here to make it well worth my time for a rare re-read, which I hardly ever do because there are just so many other books out there that I want to read.  If you liked Untamed, I also suggest Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb and Life Will Be the Death of Me:  And You Too by Chelsea Handler.

Breath- James Nestor I listened to this one as an audiobook.  It was around seven hours long and worked really well as audio because at the end there are breathing exercises.  I am very aware of my open mouth breathing now and found it to be a fascinating listen and important reminder of how important proper breathing is for a healthy life.

The Awakened Family- I was listening to an Oprah meditation series and she referenced a quote from this book.  So I wanted to know more and read the whole thing.  I wish I had come across this book five years ago but it was still a very worthwhile read. 

Book of Two Ways- I have always enjoyed the way Jodi Piccoult weaves so much fact into her stories.  This book had a lot about Egyptian archeology and the present day work of a death doula- both topics I know little about.  Piccoult continues to be one of my favorite fiction authors.

Favorite New Author discovery:  Matt Haig- I first saw him mentioned in reference to his new fiction book, The Midnight Library but then I also came across his memoir Reasons to Stay Alive and NonFiction book Notes on A Nervous Planet.  And then, while waiting for these holds to be available,  I read How to Stop Time- All of these books were great and I am glad I stumbled upon his works. 

Teaching in a Pandemic

 I have been teaching for 27 years and never has a year been more challenging or stranger than this one.  Here are a few things I thought I would mention.

1. It is not the what, it's the who-  More than ever I need to focus on the people not the objects (like iPads and books) .  We can efficiently toss an iPad in their hands but if we do not check and see how they are doing, we have given them a procrastination device not a learning tool.  And focusing on the person is for all aspects of life.  Rather than feeling frustrated at all I cannot do, I am focusing on the people in my life.  Building strong relationships (virtually of course) so when this is over I have someone left to celebrate with :)

2. While we have always worked on WHAT to teach, the winners in this game will be those who focus on HOW to learn.  We could have a transformational year if we all focused on soft skills that last a lifetime such as time management, task initial and self control.  We are simply asking too much of students.  For years they have been micro- managed with someone standing over them to put the phone away, open the book, get your pencil out.  Now suddenly they sit alone in a room and we expect them to magically have skills of a CEO such as running 8 different projects (classes) at once.  We are frustrating everyone- student, teacher and parent.  And how much learning is really occurring?  I am not trying to be negative, I am trying to be realistic and acknowledge that if ever there was a time for reflection and root cause- now is the time.  Look at what is happening and why it is happening.  Try to solve the root cause and we will come out of this with self-starter students who can take on anything.

3.  Teaching to the void is REALLY weird.  I understand there are sound reasons to let students learn with their camera off and microphone muted.  But also understand that it is really hard to monitor understanding with zero feedback.  I had no idea how much a relied on non-verbal feedback until I had none.  And in the meantime my camera is on and I try not to show the desperation in my face as I wait for someone, anyone to say something, anything.  I do not know if there is much of a solution for this other than trying to build community and trust enough that a few students turn their camera on.  

Finally- if you know of any decision maker in education- please pass this along.  This is my open letter of what it takes for successful face to face instruction.  (Pasted Below)

If I could get a decision maker to listen to what it takes for successful face to face instruction, here is what I would tell them:

1. Be firm with families and remind them often what it takes for schools to remain open

Here is an example of what you could say:  If you want schools to remain open remember everyone in the household  needs to make good choices 24/7 not just while in school.  This message should be tweeted, emailed, announced, and done so weekly at a minimum.  The message of being a COMMUNITY has never been more important.  It is about priorities.  If we all truly want schools open safely, everyone needs to be on the same page, at school, after school and on the weekends.

2. Be innovative.  The best solutions to this unprecedented scenario will not look anything like what we have done before.  It is more important than ever to have a clear vision and use that vision to make a successful plan.  Here is an example:  Our number one goal is to educate not to provide child care.  So we must look at this as the best way to provide education in a SUSTAINABLE way.  It might be remote learning.  This on again, off again, start and stop filled with quarantines is very ineffective.  Also- fair is not always equal.  We need to see who needs in person the most and do everything we can to provide for those students.  It should not be “open for all or open for none”- clearly priority should be given to those struggling academically and emotionally.  

3. Science should drive decision making.  For example- what are the most dangerous parts of a school day?  Eating lunch with no masks.  Therefore if you want the face to face to be successful do half days with bag lunches that students take home.  Also face to face time should be shorter.  Viral load has a lot to do with catching this.  So either have true cohorts like you could in an elementary class or have short class but these so-called cohorts with teachers teaching six different rosters and students attending 8 different mixed classes do not set us up for successful in-person learning.  

4. Ask for teacher and parent input- Don’t just listen to the squeaky wheel. So many of these decisions are made by people who are not living it day by day.  Here is the latest example- Parents were told the students could choose whether they attend in person or not.  They can choose class by class if they want to come to school or be remote.  The teacher has no idea who might be there any given period.  There are teachers planning face to face instruction only to have one student show up for class and the rest to be remote.  This totally changes the lesson.  Teachers are told  to be flexible without any consideration to how “being flexible” every single period of every single day can create exhaustion and set them up for lessons not to feel successful.  It is more important than ever to make decisions that support everyone, including teachers.

5. Communicate sincere information not positive platitudes  

            Here is an example:  When the county moves to orange and teachers are told this will 

change the quarantine process and teachers ask how will it change and the answer is- we need to be flexible and see how it plays out.  No- there should be a clear plan already in place.  In order for us to feel safe we need to know thought is going into all of the scenarios.

6. Don’t punish teachers for asking questions.  Everyone should feel safe to understand the process and what is happening.  When you use phrases like- “you have a choice- you can resign” you are creating a threatening atmosphere rather than one of trust. (Not to mention- our choice is leave of absence so using the term resign is definitely not coming from a place of support.)

7. Avoid hypocrisy  - Related to the communication that because of rising cases, parents and students can choose to stay remote.  But teachers can’t make that choice.  To me the unstated message is - teachers you take the risk but students don’t have to.

Ten Day Hiking Challenge

I love this quote from The Fellowship of the Ring:

After spending too much time cleaning and doing puzzles and lamenting about how hot it is, I decided I needed to make a plan.  So I created my own ten day hiking challenge to do ten hikes of at least ten miles for ten days in a row.  I also listened to the Lord of the Rings Trilogy while I hiked.

It was a fun challenge.  Here is one photo and one thought from each day:

Friday June 26- Ten mile loop at hall Ranch
Day one was easy - feeling motivated and loving the time on the trail.

Saturday June 27- Laurel and I decided to plan a backpacking trip to Thunder Lake.  The hike in was about seven miles and then we did some exploring to get up to ten.

This was our first mother-daughter backpacking trip and it was a ton of fun, especially with our hammock, mini playing cards, music and jetboil stove.  

Sunday June 28- Hiking out from Thunder Lake.  First I did some early morning exploring and then we hiked out.  I love early hiking in the backcountry- awesome lighting and no one else around.

Monday June 29- Early start to beat the heat (just like all the other days).  Headed to Rabbit Mountain with Willow.  She was happy to be included.  We did all three trails to get the ten mile goal in.

Tuesday June 30- Woke up at 4:30 so I could get to RMNP before six when the timed entry starts.  I parked at East Portal Trailhead and explored many of the trails around this area.  I was very surprised to come around the bend and see this guy with three of his friends practically laying on the trail. 

Wednesday July 1- Decided to explore one of my favorite local trails- Dead Man's Gulch- and see how it connects to one of my other favorite trails at Hall Ranch.  Came across this turkey parade and it made me think of my dad because he always called me a turkey.

Thursday July 2- Another very early start to get to RMNP before 6AM.  I thought by now I would be feeling great and enjoy this ten mile loop around Deer Mountain.  But between the heat and the elevation gain and the altitude, I was hurting.  I considered stopping the challenge and just making it a one week challenge.  Another interesting thing about this hike is it was a ten mile loop right in the center of the park, and still I only saw one person as I was coming off the loop.

Friday July 3- Even though I was feeling pretty tired I decided to at least give it a try.  I headed back to Hall Ranch but just did the Nighthawk Trail up and back to avoid bicycle traffic.  Even though I started out really tired, with each mile I felt better and I was really glad to head out again.  I always wonder when I pass this impressive rock wall 4.5 miles into the hike who built it and what the story is.  It is a very well constructed wall that I am sure served a purpose at sometime but for now it just feeds my imagination.

Saturday July 4- Laurel and I head out early to do a training hike for an upcoming backpacking trip.  We head up Flattop Mountain and continue along the Continental Divide Trail until we hit 5 miles.  It is an amazing day for an awesome hike.  Over 3000 feet in elevation gain but we still feel great.

 Sunday July 5- Justin and I did an afternoon hike from Button Rock to Hall Ranch via the Nighthawk Trail.  Even though I was on day ten I did not feel very strong.  I do not know how thru hikers do it or when it kicks in but for me, day ten felt harder than day one.  But I am glad I did the challenge and now it is time to catch up on chores.

College 101

Here is what I have learned so far about trying to afford and find a college. 

You know how people say small liberal arts schools cost less than state schools?  It is true (sort of). If you do not qualify for need-based aid and do qualify for merit-based scholarships, it might be worth looking at private schools.  College is an excellent study in economics and the law of supply and demand.  In our situation, the most our children would get at state schools like CSU and CU Boulder was 1000 off a year, even with high test scores and higher than 4.0 gpa’s and many activities.   In addition, many classes have hundreds of students taught by TA’s. This did not feel like a fair value for $27,000.  The small liberal arts schools level the playing field by giving money not just need based but also lots of merit based. (Note- not all schools are like this. Some are need blind. From what I can gather this is also bad for middle class. They also do not give merit based and all money is based on need. If you are middle class in an area of the country with a relatively high cost of living, the formula is not going to work out in your favor. )

You know how people say test scores aren’t everything?  Not so true. We chose to have our daughter miss a very academic-heavy year to do some amazing adventures. I do not regret this. Her life is richer and she is more prepared for college. But, especially in the area of math, it probably effected her scores. And while she had very good scores, they were not high enough for some of the most lucrative scholarships. I would listen to this podcast and heed the advice.  Disciplined test prep and practice will go a long way and possibly pay off.  I wish I heard this podcast before this week. 

As far as the final package, it felt a lot like buying a new car. There is the sticker price which does not even come close to what we will pay. There is the initial offer which is a ballpark idea and then there is the final offer which is significantly lower than the initial package. 

When all is said and done, it is still way more than you would have saved if all you rely on is the maximum college savings plan. We started this when each child was born. We deposited 150 monthly. This equaled about 32000 and it grew to 46000 for each child by the time we started drawing it down. But it won’t come close to paying for college. 

So where does all this leave us?  

The final decision is up to the children. We can contribute a set amount per child per year. Anything above that will be for them to cover. So they might decide to do community college for a year or summer school or college loans (greatly discouraged) or get some high paying jobs. We were clear from the beginning what this amount would be. 

Here is one more interesting piece of information. The more competitive the school, the less merit money you will get. So, unless you want to pay full price, you might not want to look at the more selective schools unless you qualify for need-based aid. Here are rough stats. A school with 25% acceptance rate, accepted but no merit scholarships. A school with 50% acceptance rate provided a $30,000 merit scholarship which left $30,000 balance and a school with 93% acceptance rate gave a package that would have cost $18,500 for tuition, room and board. So bottom line is if you won’t qualify for need based aid, consider less competitive schools if you want better packages. However if you want your child to attend a more competitive school you need to weigh if it is worth the debt you or your child will take on. 

Good luck. At a minimum I would suggest a tour at a small liberal arts school as part of your college search. They have a lot to offer and it is important to consider and weigh these factors as you make the big decision. 

I found The College Finder Book a really great resource.   
I also really found this article interesting. 

https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/2019/5/1/18311548/college-admissions-secrets-myths

This was my favorite quote:  "The four years of college are as important socially as they are educationally — the right fit is far more important than getting into the highest-ranked school you can."  The whole article is a reminder to keep things in perspecive, but I especially liked point #7.
 

Update:  In March we went to a Scholars Weekend at one of her final choices.  There was the chance to be selected for a four year full tuition scholarship.  Since this school was in her top three and the dates fell over spring break, we decided to go.  She loved the school and when we returned home she learned she was chosen for the full tuition scholarship.  Better yet, since this school is in the Mid-West, housing costs are significantly lower than Colorado.  So that is something else to consider.... All in all it was a very eye opening experience.  We do not have it totally figured out but maybe this info will help get someone started who, like us, does not believe debt is the only way to get through college. 

Puzzling

It has been way too long since I have written a post.  Not so much because nothing has happened but more so because EVERYTHING has happened.  Most notably we sold our nice big house and downsized to a small townhouse in Novemeber.  The plan was to use this as an economical base during the college years and spend a lot of time hiking, camping and backpacking.  Well- the joke's on us.  Little did we know our daughter would return home early from college and who knows when the nest will be empty.  But at least we have a mortgage free place to live, even if it is a little small, it takes some financial pressure off and leaves us with some money for Airbnbs when it gets to cramped.

The start of the Covid Life was pretty scary.  My sister was one of the first to get it from community spread while working in a nursing home.  She was very sick and this was a personal and impactful intro to our "new normal" and what we had to fear.  Then I was busy wrapping up an online school year and doing a lot of cooking now that everyone is home 24/7.  But just last week I had a bit of downtown and completed three 1000 piece puzzles in one week.  It made me wonder how others tackle the fun of a puzzle.  Here is my gameplan:

1.  Sort and complete edges first and roughly sort remaining pieces by color

2. Once there are not too many pieces left, sort by color and then by shape

Completed puzzle :)

Tahoe Rim Trail

We just got back from a nine day 120 mile backpacking trip. I always wondered what a longer trip would be like. Now I know.  Mostly it was really challenging. There were a couple surprises.  I was hoping that with each day I would feel stronger. But after the first three days I just felt more beat up at the end of each day. Usually I was ready for the hiking to end about two hours before it did each day. Even though we agreed at the start that we were going to take it easy and not go too hard it is a lot harder in the day to day to do this.  Backpacking reminds me of the board game Settlers of Catan. But instead of a good ratio of resources, you need shelter, food and water.  So first we would need to get near water.  Then we would need to find suitable (meaning flat) land for a tent, then we would need to have a rough daily mileage of 15 miles so our food would last for the whole trip.  When you put all those issues together it, along with swarms of mosquitoes, is not as easy to take it easy as one would think.  I still really enjoyed the challenge and the beauty and the teamwork with Justin but I don’t think I have the grit in me that true thru hikers have.  Nine days was enough and I was really happy when I did not have to dig holes for toilets and worry about where the next water supply was. 

Here is what I loved most:

• Stoveless cooking- I did not miss the stove at all.  I have always loved snickers and all the other treats I packed and I felt perfectly nourished.  
• Wildflowers- I just love fields of wildflowers and this hike was no different- I think my trail name would be Flower Power because whenever we came across a field of wildflowers I felt new energy, even if I was exhausted.
• I could not have done this hike without these things:  (worth carrying)- backpacking pillow and air mattress, hiking poles, dirty girl gaiters (keeps pebbles out of your shoes), battery pack for my phone
• I really liked having the Guthook app.  Granted it would have been nice if there was a little more crowdsourcing but even the basic info was really handy. I liked seeing where I was and how far I had gone and how much further we had to go until the next water or break.

Here is what surprised me:

• I still had a list of things to do on my mind.  I thought I would just be walking and thinking about anything but there is always something to think about- in this case it was where a good rock to pee behind was or what to clean at the next water spot or what to remember to get from my pack at the next break....
• The Tahoe Rim Trail was not nearly as crowded as I expected- we met very few others doing the loop and even fewer day hikers.  Even the 50 mile stretch that merged with the PCT trail was not very crowded.
• My water pump stopped working three days into the hike. I have since learned this abrupt problem has happened to others. Luckily Justin’s Sawyer was fine.  Always have a back up water supply. 

In case you are interested here is a day by journal of what our hike consisted of:

Day 1:  We got to the hotel around 1AM local time.  We got up at 6AM and took an Uber to the Tahoe Meadows Trailhead near Mount Rose.  We started a southbound, clockwise loop at about 8:30 AM.  Day one was spectacular.  It was a really nice way to start the hike- beautiful views, a really nice trail and perfect weather.  After 13.5 miles on the trail (although 16 miles total including the scenic loop and water run) we wrapped things up at Marlette Campground.  Surprisingly only one other person was at the campground. 

Day2:  I am really glad day two is over.  I knew it was going to be hard for two reasons- no water and a long day of hiking.  We got up at six and were hiking by seven.  Before we left camp I drank two liters of water since I knew it was a long hard day with no water along the way.  We also filled all our extra water bags which meant heavy packs- especially for Justin who carried a lot of the extra water.  The day started with a good climb.  Soon we were at Spooner Lake.  We were deciding if we should walk a mile downhill to the lake to get more water when a nice guy offered to give us a gallon of water from his car.  That along with what we still had was enough to get us to Kingsbury the next morning.  It saved us at least an hour of going down and up from the lake.  Yay for trail angels!  SO we crossed the highway and started a pretty steady climb for the next two hours.  This was hard.  It was hot.  We were rationing water and for me uphills are always harder in the afternoon after hiking all morning.  Finally we got to the top but we still had a lot more miles to cover.  After 18 miles we made it to a flat enough area to camp.  Our waterless day is over!

Day 3
Today was somewhat of a near-o day (kind of like a zero day but with a few miles). We hiked out 5.5 miles to where the trail intersects with 206 in Kingsbury. Ben, Jeannie, Connor and Skyler drove up from Folsom to meet us for lunch. We ate at a delicious place right on Lake Tahoe. It was cool to see the lake up close after seeing it from up high. It was also awesome to see our California family. Our plan was to resupply at the supermarket and head out in the afternoon but after hiking in the afternoon heat yesterday I suggested we stay here and get an early start tomorrow for a long solid day of hiking. So we got a room, cleaned our clothes and took a shower. Then we walked to the supermarket and carefully chose five days worth of food because we have about 80 miles to cover before our next resupply. We also won’t have much cell coverage so you might not be getting many updates these next few days.

Day 4
We ate breakfast before heading out of South Lake Tahoe and took a Lyft to the trailhead. We were heading up a steady uphill by 8am. I used to listen to a backpacking podcast called the first forty miles. The meaning behind the title was that it takes 40 miles to get your groove on in a backpacking trip. Early on today’s hike we hit 40 miles for the trip. And today definitely went smoother but it is still plenty challenging. After a few hours we crossed over from Nevada to California. Then we stopped for lunch at Star Lake. After that we climbed a little more to our highest point for the day before a long decent to where we set up camp after a 14.3 mile day. Even though our packs were heavy with five days worth of food it helped that we only ever had to carry one liter of water since there were more steams than the past three days.

Day 5
Today we got another early start. We were hiking by 6:30. We had a brief uphill followed by a really nice downhill through a meadow of wildflowers. Then we stopped to eat breakfast at a beautiful viewpoint of Lake Tahoe. After that we had a very long decent to the Great Meadows Trailhead. After filling up our water we hiked another two miles uphill to round lake for lunch. Then we went a few more miles uphill to where the Pacific Crest Trail and the Tahoe Rim Trail combine together. After about 17 miles we wrapped things up at Shower Lake. This gave us time to enjoy the lake and the views and rest up to get another early start tomorrow.

Day 6
Another early start. Good news is it seems our water worries are behind us. Bad news is with water comes mosquitoes. The ying and yang of life.  We decided to skip eating breakfast at our site in search of a place less buggy. After walking for awhile we decided to just eat something quick. Soon we started a really long descent. Usually our hikes average about 3000 feet of elevation gain a day. It is somewhat of a roller coaster with a good amount of ups and downs through the day and nothing is ever so steep up or down that I can’t take it - just enough to feel like a good workout. But the descent we had this morning was killer. My knees and ankles were so sore by the time it was lunch. I also was nursing a couple hotspots from yesterday that I do not want to turn into blisters. Justin could tell I needed a little boost so he made the wise decision to call it a day after ten miles and rest up. We are ahead of schedule anyway because our permit for Desolation Wilderness begins tomorrow and we already made it to that point of the trail. So we will head into town, rest my feet and hit the trail again first thing in the morning. The only regret is if we had known this we could have carried less food the last couple days. But at least we don’t have to waste time resupplying. So off to an unexpected but much needed shower and back on the trail first thing tomorrow.

Day 7
By 8am we were entering Desolation Wilderness. We have been looking forward to this part of the hike and it did not disappoint. First we walked along Echo Lake and after five miles we made it to the gem for lunch- Aloha Lake. We actually took two lunch breaks here because it was that spectacular and also we were not in a huge rush since we were planning a shorter day today. Aloha Lake also had ideal foot soaking areas and my feet are still in need of a lot of soaking after yesterday’s killer downhill- I am still not back to myself. After lunch we continued on past several other lakes until we stopped at Gilmore Lake around 4:00pm. Even though we only clocked 11 miles, it still took awhile with all the photo stops. Also there was quite a bit of rerouting for snow and the terrain was not the fastest to traverse.

Day 8
A week ago we hit the trail. Since then we have covered over 100 miles on the Tahoe Rim Trail. Today we did about 15.5 miles. Our morning started with swarms of mosquitoes. We broke down camp. (Well let’s be honest mostly- Justin broke down camp- he has been pulling a lot of weight on this trip- finding camping spots, getting water and making sure we stay on trail when there is too much snow to follow the trail.). Anyway.... after leaving Gilmore Lake we headed up to Dicks Pass. This was a good climb and we had some snow but the harder part was on the downhill on the other side. It was hard to stay on the trail with all the snow and there were a couple parts I had to sled down on my bottom. Sledding in July was a first for me but I do not recommend sledding with out a tube. My tailbone hurts. Once we got over the pass and through the snow the rest of the day was pretty uneventful. After about ten miles the mosquitoes let up and thankfully our lake tonight- Richardson- has a nice breeze and we are bug free.

Day 9
Another early start- trying to get miles in before it gets hot. Once again we ate on the run from mosquitoes. We went up and down and up again and finally found a little reprieve so we took our first break of the day. Then we headed across our final snowy area. As we got closer to Tahoe City we started looking for somewhere to camp but the closer we got, the more we realized we were getting too close to town for good camping so after about 18 miles for the day we hitched a ride with a couple at the trailhead and they dropped us off at the closest brewery to celebrate. So after 9 days we are wrapping things up with more than 120 miles on the Tahoe Rim Trail. We won’t finish the entire circuit but we got pretty far and had a lot of fun. Special thanks to Justin for being the brains behind the operation on most days.